For the one I love

No Matter What I will Always Love U (Shared by: "Pallavi Kate" <pallavikate86@gmail.com>)

 There are times when will upset me
and cause me unwanted anger,
but no matter what " I will always love you".

There are cruel words you might say that
will cause me hurt and bring me sadness,
but no matter what " I will always love you".

There are going to be unwise decisions that
you will make that will disappoint me,
but no matter what " I will always love you".

There are actions you might act upon that
will cause me to worry about you,
but no matter what " I will always love you".

There will be moments where you
will make me cry and bring me to tears,
but no matter what " I will always love you".

There will be unforgivable mistakes that
you bring upon me,
but no matter what " I will always love you".

There will be lies told to me in which you
test my trust in you,
but no matter what " I will always love you".
-Fropki

You Have 3 Minutes to Impress a Woman

Start the clock the second she smiles back, gentlemen. You get just three minutes before a woman decides if you’re worth her time, according to a recent British survey.

In a new poll, more than 3,000 women—well, British women, anyway—revealed that a first impression involves a quick analysis of your looks, physique, fashion sense, ambition, and potential signs of wealth and success.

As a man, it’s hard to walk away from reading a study like this without feeling vaguely like a hapless civilian charged with defusing a bomb—only that bomb happens to be a beautiful tennis player standing in line at Starbucks, and your wire cutters are nothing but bad one-liners stolen from David Caruso. Say the wrong thing, wear the wrong jacket, spray the wrong cologne, and . . . she’s gone.

But first let’s acknowledge an uncomfortable truth: Are we any better? Three minutes would be a downright generous amount of time for most guys I know to make up their minds about a woman they’ve just met. I have a friend who dismisses girls in seconds based on the Seinfeldian rubric of ankle size.

Like one editor put it in our morning meeting, I’m pleasantly surprised that it takes the average woman 180 ticks of the clock to size us up.  Three minutes is an eternity in the dilated-time alternate universe where first impressions get made.

Sure, three minutes is about the length of the average movie trailer. But it’s also the same amount of time it took Braveheart to turn the Scots from weak-kneed saps into battle-ready warriors. It took Michael Vick and the Eagles just 1:16 two Sundays ago to complete perhaps the biggest upset in that team’s history. Hell, you could summarize seven seasons of Lost in the time frame you’ve been given to simply make her smile.

It’s not as hard as you might think. Our very own Carolyn Kylstra went on 100 dates to help distill the perfect first-impression formula. And please, relax. Feel free to improvise. There’s no need to hurry.

Cracked Pot

Cracked Pot

An elderly Chinese woman had two large pots,each hung on the ends of a pole which she carried across her neck.
 
One of the pots had a crack in it while the other pot was perfect and always delivered a full portion of water.

 

At the end of the long walks from the stream to the house, the cracked pot arrived only half full.

 

For a full two years this went on daily, with the woman bringing home only one and a half pots of water.

 

Of course, the perfect pot was proud of its accomplishments.

 

But the poor cracked pot was ashamed of its own imperfection, and miserable that it could only do half of what it had been made to do.
 
After two years of what it perceived to be bitter failure, it spoke to the woman one day by the stream.

 

'I am ashamed of myself, because this crack in my side causes water to leak out all the way back to your house.'
 
The old woman smiled, 'Did you notice that there are flowers on your side of the path, but not on the other pot's side?'

 

'That's because I have always known about your flaw, so I planted flower seeds on your side of the path, and every day while we walk back, you water them.'

 

For two years I have been able to pick these beautiful flowers to decorate the table.

 

Without you being just the way you are, there would not be this beauty to grace the house.'

 

Each of us has our own unique flaw. But it's the cracks and flaws we each have that make our lives together so very interesting and rewarding.
 
You've just got to take each person for what they are and look for the good in them.
 
SO, to all of my cracked pot friends, have a great day and remember to smell the flowers on your side of the path!

Tricking the Nun

Tricking the Nun 

A hippie gets onto a bus and sits next to a nun in the front seat. The hippie looks over and asks the nun if she would have sex with him.

The nun, surprised by the question, politely declines and gets off at the next stop. When the bus starts again, the bus driver says to the hippie, "If you want, I can tell you how you can get that nun to have sex with you."

The hippie of course says that he'd love to know, so the bus driver tells him that every Tuesday evening at midnight the nun goes to the cemetery to pray to the lord. "If you went dressed in robes and some glowing powder," says the bus driver, "You could tell her you were God and command her to have sex with you."

The hippie decides to try this out. That Tuesday, he goes to the cemetery and waits for the nun. Right on schedule, the nun shows up. While she's in the middle of praying, the hippie walks out from hiding, in robes and glowing with a mask of god. "I am God, I have heard your prayers and I will answer them but you must have sex with me first," he says.

The nun agrees but asks for anal sex so she might keep her virginity. The hippie agrees to this and quickly sets about having sex with the nun.

After the hippie finishes, he rips off his mask and shouts out, "Ha ha, I'm the hippie! "

The nun replies by whipping off her mask and shouting, "Ha ha, I'm the bus driver!"